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Showing posts from June, 2014

Ode to the Blue Suit

On June 15, I celebrated my day of emancipation, or I would have, had I been waiting for it.  Three years ago, I left one life behind not knowing what the next life would bring. I gratefully and happily left my job.  I had no plan, no way to make a living, no idea of what would come, only that I wanted freedom more than anything else I had ever wanted in my life.  Since then, I calculate that I have not made $640,000.00, but who’s counting?

I was wearing gold shoes that day, quite serendipitously, as gold is the colour of emancipation.  I was also wearing a navy blue, double breasted Calvin Klein suit. For almost three years, every time I put on the suit, I felt claustrophobic.  The Blue Suit (yes, it deserves capitals) represented jail.

I wore that suit to a board planning session about 3 weeks ago, not realizing that this was ’the suit', and quite honestly, it never occurred to me that this was “the suit of emancipation.”  It was just a blue suit.  And that’s all it is.  The a…

In the space between

You sang this song to me one night in my secret life, in between darkness and light.  Your words touched my heart and revealed my soul. You made me smile. You made me cry.  You sang this song to me, asking me to follow you, beyond the pale of my existence.  I did, afraid but curious to discover the places I had never been.  Eyes closed, I walked to the edge of what I could feel, not knowing where I would go as you sang the story of my secret life to me.  I began to sing along, though I did not know the words.  I found myself there, at the precipice of my own making. I jumped to feel alive.  In falling I could fly.  I was changed.  And still I search for that song that exists in between darkness and light.