Ode to the Blue Suit

On June 15, I celebrated my day of emancipation, or I would have, had I been waiting for it.  Three years ago, I left one life behind not knowing what the next life would bring. I gratefully and happily left my job.  I had no plan, no way to make a living, no idea of what would come, only that I wanted freedom more than anything else I had ever wanted in my life.  Since then, I calculate that I have not made $640,000.00, but who’s counting?

I was wearing gold shoes that day, quite serendipitously, as gold is the colour of emancipation.  I was also wearing a navy blue, double breasted Calvin Klein suit. For almost three years, every time I put on the suit, I felt claustrophobic.  The Blue Suit (yes, it deserves capitals) represented jail.

I wore that suit to a board planning session about 3 weeks ago, not realizing that this was ’the suit', and quite honestly, it never occurred to me that this was “the suit of emancipation.”  It was just a blue suit.  And that’s all it is.  The attachments are gone. The memories of are gone but not the lessons.

In the end I can say I am grateful for that experience because it caused me to make the changes in my life that were screaming out at me in other ways.  Had that final experience not happened that ultimately led to my desire for freedom I fear I would still be there.  And that would be a tragedy.