Speaking of Voice

I wonder if when men speak of over coming challenge, do they refer to potty training a child? Or perhaps bringing a perfect recipe over the finish line?  Do they talk about their physical features with their friends? Do they make plans for their lives hoping the women in  their lives will follow then and forsake their own plans?

That last one is a trick question.  To that, I might say, more often than you think.  To the first three examples, I seriously doubt, but maybe I am wrong. 

As a business person, I pride myself on doing an above average - no excellent - job at what I do.  I bring in my projects over the finish line on time with objectives realized and I do it in such a way that my customers know that they are appreciated.  The job that I do has nothing at all to do with the fact that I am a woman.  

And so when we attach titles to women who are in business, as “women in business” I find it demeaning.  I am a woman, according to all the gender determinations set forth by nature, and I am a business person, according to my results and reputation.  

And that should be it.  When I attend events that are gatherings of women who are professionals, I find that the story tends to stray into the the examples in my opening paragraph - as if we can all relate to potty training a baby, or bringing a recipe over the finish line.  Personally, it’s been 26 years since I last potty trained a child, and never since I brought in a recipe over the finish line, because I don’t cook and when I do, it’s not by recipe.  

So the question is why do we do this? And do men do it too?  

I have also heard it said that women possess a higher level of emotional intelligence than men, and therefore make good leaders of people, but I have worked for more women who lack EI than men. I have worked for men and women whose EI was so low it touched the ground when they walked. So that’s also not true from a gender perspective. 

I will say I observe something more prominently in women than I do in men, and that is the art of moving over - of stepping aside, of speaking in their voice.  I see this in women of all ages, so clearly it’s not about age.  So what’s it about? I wish I knew because I do it too sometimes.